Work with me, please.

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I earned the title of “Best Mommy Ever” just for tying old curtains to Mae’s bunk bed to create a fortress for her. I’ll be awesome at least until I wake her up in the morning, at which time she’ll treat me like a bad cold.

Earlier tonight, I almost got on her bad side because I was taking too long to get her a cup of water. She told me calmly , “If I were you, I’d be done by now.” I’m so frigging tired today that I just gave her a mean look and left it at that.

I had the rare opportunity to help Jay with his bath tonight, which made for an insightful etymology moment. I reminded him to wash his penis and testicles. He said, “What are ‘testicles’?” I pointed. He laughed and said, “Oh, they feel like balls.” A few minutes later, I asked him to finish rinsing. He said, “Ok. I have to rinse my barnacles.” I corrected him. He said, “I keep forgetting.” And, now it makes perfect sense to me how it came to be that one word got substituted for another.

Raising kids is such a soup of awesomeness, awkwardness, and awfulness. From one day to the next, you don’t know what you’re going to get. Amazing.

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